Healer, Redeemer. Lord, I need you.

Healer, Redeemer. Lord, I need you.

I remember once, as a child, I was goofing around in the house, and I broke a figurine that belonged to my mother.  I knew that I was going to be in ALOT of trouble.  She was at work, and I used the time to my advantage.  I carefully matched up the pieces, applied some fast drying glue, and held the pieces in place.  Crisis averted.  You couldn’t even see the crack; as if the piece was never broken.  Within a matter of months, I had knocked the figurine over a second time.  Unfortunately on this occasion repair was impossible.

There are some instances from my past that have left me broken, and I thought I was beyond repair.  In fact, I believed that there was no saving me.  Surely these mistakes and poor choices collectively were too much for God to see me as worthy.  In my brokenness, I had lost all hope and continued making mistakes.  Finally, someone was able to bring me to that place where I understood God’s mercy and grace.  I understood forgiveness; I learned that Christ died on the cross for not only the sins I knowingly committed… but even the ones I didn’t know were on the horizon.  He died for them all.

I was so desperate to walk forward in that freedom. Freedom from the mantle of grief and shame.  I had forgiven those whom others would deem as unforgivable.  I even forgave myself, which is sometimes harder than forgiving others.  I was trying to walk in victory. I stumbled often.  There was this one thing that kept haunting me, this one moment in a sea of others that I couldn’t seem to shake.  This one event that had such a hold of me that I would find myself crouched in a corner crying out:

LORD, take this from me!

I wanted so much to be like the figurine that I broke.  I wanted God to fix me to the point where the trauma was invisible.  However, the Lord didn’t heal me.

A few years ago, at a Women’s Retreat, a speaker shared that sometimes we hold onto a trauma as if it is too big for God to redeem.  She stated that by holding on to it we were in sin, and God couldn’t bless us until we stopped hanging on to it.  In retrospection after the retreat, I believed this must be my situation.  I confessed to the Lord about holding onto this trauma; I wanted to heal from my brokenness; and I prayed that He would give me the strength, courage, and peace to let it go.

It continued to haunt me. I cried out:

LORD, take this from me!

The Lord didn’t take it; I was becoming discouraged.  I convinced myself that it was Satan trying to hurt and distract me.  He was whispering memories of this in my ear.  It was his attempt to make me doubt myself, disqualify myself as worthy, and hold me back from the good work the Lord would have for me.  I rebuked Satan’s hold on me and waited for the freedom of healing.

The Lord didn’t heal me.  I cried out:

LORD, take this from me!

I just couldn’t take it anymore.  I felt defeated.  Terrified that this trauma was going to hold on to me for the rest of my life.  I wasn’t the entirely pieced together figurine, held together by God’s strength.  I was in pieces all over the ground, shattered.  Or, so I thought.

Last week, I attended a Women’s Event hosted by Authentic Intimacy.  It was at this event Dr. Juli Slattery shared a revelation that would rock me to the core. She shared that some women are healed of their past trauma.  These women are fully recovered and restored, living out their lives as if the trauma was wiped from history and their memory.  These healings are MIRACLES and miracles are RARE.  For the majority of us, God instead chooses to REDEEM our trauma. The process takes time, and for some of us we will not see full victory this side of Heaven.  Victory, however, is still ours because as the Lord redeems us, He will make beauty from ashes.  Our redemption becomes His story of hope to others just like us.

The Lord uses our redemption from our trauma and past to say to others who are broken…

Look to me, the Lord your God, for I can heal and redeem you.  I will make you a new creation, marking you as my own, and your testimony is the seal of my covenant with you.  I am the Lord who hears, sees, heals, restores, and redeems those who seek me with all of their mind, heart, and soul.  This child is not who she once was, and the same is the gift I gave to you on the Cross. 

An enormous weight was lifted off my shoulders that day.  I was no longer carrying a mantle of shame or guilt but instead burdened with a purpose, unlike anything I had ever experienced.  Instead of weight that pushed me down, this difficulty pushes me forward on the path He has set before me.  Each step I take, He walks ahead of me. A Good Shepherd leading the way to green pastures.

The Lord heard my cries, and he answered them by gifting me a purpose from my pain.

The Japanese have an art form known as Kintsugi. In Kintsugi, an artist takes a broken object and repairs the pieces with a lacquer mixed with gold, silver, and even platinum.  The point behind this art form is that the repairs are visible, indicating that the object had a past or history.  It honors the trauma that happened to the piece, honoring the brokenness as part of the object’s history instead of trying to hide it.  The piece is considered more beautiful because of these veins of precious metal that run throughout it, holding it together.

There are times the Lord chooses to heal completely and restore our brokenness, however for most of us the Lord instead pieces us back together with Himself.  We do have a past or history. However when others look upon us, they will see the blood of Christ holding us together.  He binds my broken pieces with the blood He shed for me.  Blood that is more valuable than gold or silver.  We are more beautiful because of Christ in us, on display for all to see.

For you know that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers, but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ.

1 Peter 1:18-19

I want God to Hear my prayer!

I want God to hear m prayer!

How do I pray and know God hears me? I honestly have to remind myself of the answer  sometimes when it seems like God isn’t there. The great thing about the God we serve is that He is always there, and He has not left us without direction. God has provided us an entire operations manual about life, The Holy Bible! The More that we read God’s Word, the more we will understand and learn what God expects from us.

And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” Mark 11:25

Forgive We can’t expect God to forgive us of our sin if we don’t forgive others.(Matt 6:14-15) It’s also important that we try to resolve any conflicts with someone who may be upset with us. The Bible says in Matthew 5:23-25 if someone is angry or upset with us we must go to them and try to resolve the situation before we come to God. So if someone gets offended by something that you did or if you had a blowout with a neighbor make things right with that person. We don’t want anything blocking our prayers and preventing God from answering. If you’re not sure if you’ve done something to offend someone, I would recommend asking God to bring it to your remembrance so you can make it right. Doing this is a humbling experience because sometimes people get offended even when you think you have done nothing wrong. Before approaching that person ask God for the strength to be gentle, loving, kind, and patient with that person.

“We know that God does not listen to sinners, but if anyone is a worshiper of God and does his will, God listens to him.” John 9:31

Confess All Sin It’s important that we confess all sin to God and ask Him for help. Let Him know that you want to change and you need His help to live a life free from sin. It’s important that we humble ourselves before God and honestly check our lifestyle and actions.

In the days of his flesh, Jesus offered up prayers and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to him who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence.” Hebrews 5:7

Reverence God Humble yourself when you come before God. Acknowledge Him for who He is. Tell God how powerful and mighty He is and how thankful you are for His grace and mercy. The book of Revelation helps me to remember who God is. I think about how God’s described and that the angels in Heaven are worshiping Him this very moment, and it humbles me.

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.” Philippians 4:6

Thank God Tell God what you need and thank Him for what He has done. Make sure you thank God for the things that He is already doing and has already done. Don’t be ungrateful! We all have a reason to thank God. He sent His Son to die on the cross for our sins so that we could have eternal life. We should never stop thanking and praising God for that!

If you’re asking for something in prayer, let God know how what you’re asking for will bring Him glory. This helps prevent the “I want because I want prayers”. I urge you to memorize Scriptures. This will allow you to claim the promises of God in prayer. For tips on how to learn Scriptures Click Here.

It’s important that when we pray we have:

  • Forgiven others and have tried to resolve all grievances.
  • Confessed our sin
  • We thank God for all the things that He has done for us.
  • Most importantly, we must reverence God for who He is and come humbly before Him.

These steps do not guarantee that God will answer your prayer on your timing or at all. God is sovereign, and He knows what we need and when we need it. These steps can help make sure we are in right standing with God before we make requests to Him.